ways to know you've completely lost your mind

I was running around today doing errands and ran into the Target. As soon as i walked in, I realized i had to pee... but i figured I'd be quick in the store and if i ignore the urge, it'd go away. So i make my way over to ladies wear dept where i find all these MUST HAVE ITEMS. i head to the dressing room (remember i have to pee) and start trying on clothes.  so as I'm trying on dresses i realize my "urge" is not going to go away. so i hurriedly get dress and rush to the front of the store and toss my items in a cart. i then make my way to the toilet. ahhhh relief! as i leave the stall, i notice a "person" standing there. I cannot decide if this is a man or a woman. I'm trying not to stare, but at the same time debating which How Dare You Face to put on in case it is a man. but since it's really hard to tell, i decide to turn around and go wash my hands. ummm? uh oh.. what's this? URINALS? OH NO, I'M IN THE MENS' ROOM!!!!!! i turn in utter disbelief to what is now very clearly a man and say OMG I'm in the men's room! he casually glances over at me and says, no big thing, I'm sure it happens all the time. I rush out and run across to the women's restroom. i stand there washing my hands convinced i must be 16 shades of red, scarlet, and purple! i then walk out of the restroom area and there in front of me are lots of target employees. i'm totally convinced they are going to toss me out of the store, possibly even arrest me for entering a men's room.  i shamefully skulk by them and grab my items and hi tail it to the kids area. i figure i can hide there until the color leaves my cheeks and i have enough nerve to purchase my items. i finally make it to the checkout counter and there AGAIN is a squad of employees but this time the rent a cop is with them. i just know for sure they are going to grab me by the elbows and ruthlessly toss me out on my keister. well, to my glee and delight, no one paid any attention to me at all. i sneaked out of there and rushed to my car. BUT i will tell you this, i had the worst sense of eewwwyyy ickyyy's after that... I'm convinced i got some kind of boy cooties!!!!