negotiating my way to a better G&R date

Now for the really big, good news... we heard from the agency coordinator who said no definite plans have been made for the G&R ceremony date yet. BUT they were thinking that it would either be Monday July 9th and/or Tuesday July 10th.  But we won't know for sure until all 7 families have touched ground in Viet Nam.  they are thinking of spitting our very large group into two different G&R days. So one very lucky group would have their G&R on Monday while the other group gloomily sulked back at the hotel. So me being me... i suggested i'd be allowed to set the schedule. Really i think i came up with a brilliant solution.... My Plan is that they take the Da Nang families (3 families adopting 3 infants) to the orphanage on Monday so they could play with their kids. Then they should take the remaining families (4 families adopting 6 kids) to Tam Ky so we could have our G&R ceremony. My brilliant logic being that those of us adopting the older sibs would need the extra time to bond with the kids. And it's easy enough to take the Da Nang families to the local orphanage since it was right there in town. Then on Tuesday, while we bonded with our older kids, the Da Nang family would have their G&R. Really this is a win win situation. We'll see if my cleverness makes its way to Those Who Rule Our Lives. but i still say my way is the best way : )

planning for the big first meeting

Well we found out last night that the cost for the car to take us to the orphanage to meet the kids is .. well ridiculously high. but we decided we'll do this (like we'd even say no !!!) but will probably only go to visit them the one day. On the bright side it is an all day event! so we'll pack some food for the day, the gifts for the kids of the orphanage and some clothes for our kids. i want to be able to donate any of the clothes that are too small for our kids. so i'm packing all their smallest size clothes and a few of the larger sizes. those of us in our travel group are getting mixed answers as to when the G&R will be. so we expect to have our travel meeting on Monday, and hopefully we'll learn more. it sounds like the current plan is to keep all the families that are flying in on July 8th in Ha Noi for the night, then flying them all down to Da Nang on the morning of the 9th. some folks were told they'd get to meet the kids that day. another family was told they'd actually have the G&R that day. we've only been told the G&R will be on Tuesday, but no word on a visit on Monday... so i suspect a lot of this will be figured out on the fly. I'm just swimming in the fact that we'll have the kids all day on Saturday!!! ALL DAY!!! I know they usually take a long nap during the afternoon, and maybe if it's really hot we'll go back to the car and nap ourselves. but whatever the day gives us, we'll be happy and delighted.

July 7th, the day we'll first meet our kids!

Oh Yeah Yeah Yeah.. i just heard back from the facilitator and he says he's arranged to have the driver take us to the orphanage on Saturday July 7. this means the first time we'll see the children will be Saturday!!!! i hope we have many hours there with them. that would be too wonderful!!!! of course it'd be great if we can take them out of the orphanage for a bit, but i know that is not allowable and how cruel to have to return them there. we don't know at this point if we'll be able to visit them again before adoption day which is looking more and more like it will be Tuesday July 10th. i hope we can squeeze in one more visit, but I'm so grateful for this one! it will be torture waiting to see them and then waiting again to bring them home. but i can survive all this knowing it's not much longer.

we get to visit with the kids!!!

just a quick note. we got an email from our facilitator today telling us he booked our airfare from Ha Noi to Da Nang. we're on the first flight out which means we'll only be in the airport an hour or so before flying down to Da Nang. after 30 hours of travel we'll want nothing more then to hit the bed and wake up two days earlier.  I had really hoped to meet up with Teresa and her kids at the airport in Ha Noi. I'm not sure that the timing will allow, but even if it's 5 minutes over coffee, if there's a way I'd just love that!

but the really great fantastic news is he told us we CAN SEE THE KIDS!!! he said he'll arrange a car and translator for us and we can see them or "play with the kids" as he said. that just made my day, week, month! this is so wonderful! i think we'll be the only ones too as no one else will be there yet. so we'll just have some quiet calm play and get to meet them time. that's what we really had hoped for. time so they could begin to get used to us. of course it will be awful to have to leave them. but I'll just have to survive on the memory of what they looked like, sounded like, giggled like.. until we can see them again. I'm going to guess it's a one time visit only. and I'll gladly grab that up! so yeah yeah yeah!!!

a very busy and a very good day.

Well today was such a great but long day! One of the members of our local adoption group hosted a gathering at her house, which is about an hour north of here. this was our biggest gathering with just about all our members there. There were so many kids running around.... it really was great. When we started this group it was supposed to be a support group to help the families going thru the adoption process, but with more and more families bringing home their kids, it'll naturally grow and evolve into a play group. I can't wait to have everyone come home with their babies!

I see in these kid's eyes the future friends of our children. And i love that feeling. Of course mom may not have a clue and our kids will make their own friends, but i can certainly steer them the right way!  The danger in all this is the desire to adopt again. AGAIN. i haven't even adopted once. and for my in-laws reading this... no worries. Jeff made me sign a stack of legal documents swearing i would never attempt another adoption. I do think my hands will be full with the pea pods two, but it's such a nice thought of bringing another child home. removing one more child from an orphanage, and in turn making room for one more child to be placed in an orphanage. but we can't save the world, just make a little dent in it.

well nothing new on our adoption front. i fedexed a WHOPPING cashiers check to the agency on Friday. for all of those who have BTDT.... what a weird feeling huh? knowing how close this brings you and still an odd thing to do. i hope more then anything our troubles with the agency are long over. we went thru such a lousy patch already with trying to switch from the old agency to this one. I'd love to have a bit of smooth sailing if you please... i did find out a seventh family is now traveling with us! man that's a whole lotta families. we are adopting a total of 10 kids now. that's so great. of course i secretly suspect that's why we were delayed so much... so they can squeeze in as many families as they could... but as long as our behinds are on that plane... and our names are on that list. i dont' care who comes!

i emailed our facilitator letting him know we booked our own hotels ( we wanted the reward points. from the cost of the hotel we were able to get David's annual pass to seaworld. Emma you're just gonna have to sneak in!) i did ask him  to let us know when we could visit the kids. as many of you know you can never get or even hope for any guarantees. so i truly hope beyond words that they come thru for us and allow us to go to the orphanage on our own. it is a big major no no to just show up uninvited and the LAST thing we're going to do is upset anyone with the power to mess things up for us. so we're hoping he'll come thru for us and arrange this visit.

I have been emailing with one (or i should say the last remaining) volunteer that has been helping us with info and pictures on the kids. she's going to try to come up to Da Nang (about an 1.5 hrs north of Tam Ky) for a visit. I'd love to meet her and the translator and ask them questions and thank them and ask tons more questions. i know i should make a long list of things i want to find out from the "mothers" but i have not had a clear thought in so long. questions like: what do they eat? how often do they eat? when you say potty trained, is this with or without assistance? do they feed themselves? put themselves to bed? shower on their own?  wow! i just made up my list of questions!!!!! I'm sure there are more things to ask... i just need to buckle down and CONCENTRATE.

Totally unrelated, but the gal who does my nails (she's Cambodian not Vietnamese. and of all things she went to Hillcrest and learned Vietnamese).  anyway she's agreed to record some words and phrases for us. i want her to say a few things for me so i can repeat them back to the kids. i hope to get the mothers to record some things too. i know the kids will love hearing their voices later on. and with any luck we'll get a bit of the kids chatting away. chances are high they'll lose their language. even if they go to hillcrest next year, it'll be a diff dialect and not the Co Tu language they would have spoken at home. my greatest dream (hmm and i have so many) is to get someone to ask them what they remember. they will lose those memories soon enough and I'd love for them to be able to hold on to them and for us to have a tiny window into what life was like before they came to be with us.

Whoop Dee Doo Dah

So big ouchy today! i got my second Hep b shot. and i forgot to tell her to put in the LEFT arm, not my right arm. oh well. so short of the 3rd hep b I'm all good to go. Jeff on the other hand.. ahhh you have to know him to love him.

We got our airline tickets today too!! i still have to read them and make absolutely sure they are as they're supposed to be.. but all four names are there and our little pea pods have their tickets HOME.  : )

There were some conflicting stories floating around about the G&R and when folks would actually arrive in Viet Nam. after talking to Amber this morning and hearing what version she was told. Orphanage visit on Monday 7/9 and G&R on Tues 7/10 (G&R btw, stands for Giving and Receiving, it is the ceremony where the Viet Nam government officially declares this child is now legally yours. This does not, however make your child legally yours in the eyes of the US government. that little tap dance takes another two weeks to complete). i called the agency and at first she tells me that since so many folks are arriving on July 8th, they will have everyone stay in Ha Noi that night and fly down the next morning.. hmm not sounding good to me. and then she tells me that flights being what they are these folks could potentially be held up in Ha Noi for several days!! this would mean we would not be adopting our kids till Wed or Thurs or even later that week!! so of course, i freaked (oh wouldn't you???) and got quite upset. i said i wish someone had told me this before i booked tickets to have us arrive an entire week early and what, we just sit around and do nothing waiting for all these folks to make their way down to Da Nang??? so, knowing already the answer to this question.. i toss out.. Well can we at least go to the orphanage while we're waiting?? and to my shock and surprise she says YES!!!! that the facilitator had already thought of that and suggested it himself. he would contact the orphanage director and let her know that we would stop by.  and just to let him know which date! OMG!!!! this is a gift from above. we can see the kids and not have a huge army of folks with us??? we can leisurely and casually head down there and spend some quiet time with them. all by ourselves  : )
so once i heard that, i forgot about the potentially delayed G&R. i can see my kids. i can spend some time with them. of course the orphanage is 1.5 hours away.. but who cares? it's not like we're going there to hang out by the pool bar! so i happily and hurriedly called Jeff and said wait till you hear this.... so we were both really happy at the end of that call. But then, to make this more confusing, i get home and there's an email from the agency. oh well, you do have a G&R date after all, my bad!!! she says the "target" date for the G&R (what is this a military operation??) is Tuesday 7/10. so this could be a really great win win situation. we'll still head down there on Monday to visit with the kids. and then on Tuesday go down again with the group and this time bring the munchkins two home! so mark your calenders ladies and gents.. July 10th is adoption day!!!!!!!

ways to know you've completely lost your mind

I was running around today doing errands and ran into the Target. As soon as i walked in, I realized i had to pee... but i figured I'd be quick in the store and if i ignore the urge, it'd go away. So i make my way over to ladies wear dept where i find all these MUST HAVE ITEMS. i head to the dressing room (remember i have to pee) and start trying on clothes.  so as I'm trying on dresses i realize my "urge" is not going to go away. so i hurriedly get dress and rush to the front of the store and toss my items in a cart. i then make my way to the toilet. ahhhh relief! as i leave the stall, i notice a "person" standing there. I cannot decide if this is a man or a woman. I'm trying not to stare, but at the same time debating which How Dare You Face to put on in case it is a man. but since it's really hard to tell, i decide to turn around and go wash my hands. ummm? uh oh.. what's this? URINALS? OH NO, I'M IN THE MENS' ROOM!!!!!! i turn in utter disbelief to what is now very clearly a man and say OMG I'm in the men's room! he casually glances over at me and says, no big thing, I'm sure it happens all the time. I rush out and run across to the women's restroom. i stand there washing my hands convinced i must be 16 shades of red, scarlet, and purple! i then walk out of the restroom area and there in front of me are lots of target employees. i'm totally convinced they are going to toss me out of the store, possibly even arrest me for entering a men's room.  i shamefully skulk by them and grab my items and hi tail it to the kids area. i figure i can hide there until the color leaves my cheeks and i have enough nerve to purchase my items. i finally make it to the checkout counter and there AGAIN is a squad of employees but this time the rent a cop is with them. i just know for sure they are going to grab me by the elbows and ruthlessly toss me out on my keister. well, to my glee and delight, no one paid any attention to me at all. i sneaked out of there and rushed to my car. BUT i will tell you this, i had the worst sense of eewwwyyy ickyyy's after that... I'm convinced i got some kind of boy cooties!!!!

Woo and Hoo we got our Plane Tickets!

We got our plane tickets!!!

Todd told me he talked to the head of the Vietnam program and said all the travelers (except us) were trying to fly in on the last day possible (July 8th) and that he was having problems flying them in that day. so would it be possible to delay the G&;R one day so he could fly them in on the 9th?   i wrote Todd back this morning and said, you know we've already been delayed SIX WEEKS, so maybe you can not suggest delaying another day??? pretty please??? i explained our situation and as a dad i think he "felt my pain" (I'm very good at conveying that : ) ) so he called back and said it looks like he can get them in on the 8th and that was what he was working on. so let's all keep our fingers crossed.

Okay on to other Hey I didn't know That fact.  for the longest time i thought our kids had two last names. (like their mom, a non hyphened two last namer) turns out one of those "last names" is really their middle name. According to Todd -- who said he's booked hundreds of flights and has never seen a Vietnamese person with two last names, he said one of those last names is really their middle name. Now i did know it is Vietnamese custom to give a child lots and lots of middle names. So i double checked their Birth Certificate and saw where their dad had the same "middle" name, Muc. Unfortunately there are no commas in their names so it was hard to tell where the last name stopped and the middle named started and which is the first name. So one thing more I learned about our children.

What a weekend!

We heard back from the facilitator and he green lighted us to fly directly from Hanoi to Da Nang. this was a big issue with us for many reasons. first of all it's so much nicer in Da Nang (a coastal town) then Hanoi. secondly, we'll be in Hanoi for two weeks as it is, so why spend more time there? lastly we'll be that much closer to our kids and with any luck we can see some of the volunteers -- though not the kids.. that is a big NONO. but the volunteers can come up and we can visit with them and give them some money to buy all the kids fruit and treats.

I'm still nervous about the idea of just barely getting to Vietnam on time. I'm afraid the flights will be delayed. afraid I'll be so jet lagged that i won't have the energy to see the kids.  so maybe getting there 3 days prior is a very good thing. We're still planning on being there around 3 weeks. we figure the adoption will roll along nicely and we'll be done in 2 weeks, but the extra time at the head of our trip and tail end will be nice for sightseeing.  There are so many places we'd like to take the kids. so many things we want to teach them. (this is ice cream, it is very very yummy).  of course we also realize we can spend every day of our trip in the hotel. the kids might be too overcome by everything and will not want to leave the room. this is also good because I'll have the chance to sit right next to them and maybe they'll ignore me long enough so that i can sneak a little kiss or squeeze one of those gorgeous cheeks!

Lots of folks showed up for our baby shower and it was great showing off the kids rooms and all their goodies. we got lots of presents which helped a lot.


Dorky me forget to take the classic photos of the gift table and the pre-eaten cake. so i took this one picture of the face cake. we plan on freezing it and having it when the kids are here. really i just felt too weird cutting up their beautiful faces and watching someone eat it. yikes!