Our One Year Family Day Anniversary

Celebrating our one year anniversary at our favorite VN restaurant.





































Well somehow we made it. Today marks our one year anniversary since Adoption Day. One Year ago we became a family. Hard to think that there was a time the kids were not with us. Impossible to imagine when they weren't here running around, demanding something, getting into mischief, saying how much David Lum Daddy, Emma Lum mommy (love).

I wish i could find a way to express all the happiness, surprise, concern, thrills that have been part of our life this last year. I look at the peapods two, and can't believe how big they've grown. They are getting along so well with their language development, and no question they are American kids now... every toy they see yields a request of "OOOOhhh David want that mommy". or Emma's emphatic: EMMA'S!

So much has happened in our lives. I wish so much I could go back to those first few weeks in Vietnam. If only i knew then what i know now. I would have been infinitely more patient with David. He had such a terrible time adjusting to those massive changes. I would have remembered to use that baby carrier we dragged all over Vietnam and spent so much money on and never used once! I would have enjoyed and savored every little second of our first few days together. We played the videos of our time in Vietnam for the kids recently. David watched with a smile the scenes of us in the hotel. He watched intensely the scenes from the orphanage... a little guarded and gone was his smile. Emma on the other hand was quickly bored and went off in search of some new adventure. Maybe she was too young to remember much of her past and seems to have little interest in it now.

Adoption Day is a lot like a wedding. You have this huge lead up to it.... then the day comes and it goes by in such a swirl. You think.. was i really there? do i remember anything about that day? it was over so quickly it seems. But i look at my napping Emma and i remember her crying hysterically when we were in the municipal building. how the nanny tried to hold and comfort her but i walked right up to her and took my child into my arms. How i held her and rocked her. wow, even then the bond was so incredibly strong. I wish we could travel back and i could show all the wonderful nannies how well our two are doing.

So much has happened and so much more will happen in our lives. All those "firsts" still to come. like when David finally feels confident enough to speak up in school. Or when Emma decides she no longer needs to be held by me or sit on my lap. Some will be good some will be hard. I wish i could capture all these precious moments. hold them in a jar. so i could look at them and remember when they were ohhh so little. before they became big kids. before they learned to do things on their own. I'm in no rush for them to grow up... but i do love the progress they make each day. I can't wait for them to (re) learn their Vietnamese language.  I've been telling David how special this day is. how on this day, mommy and daddy flew (airplane, right mommy?) to Vietnam and asked the wonderful people there if David and Emma could come home with us. how we loved them so much. How we became a family. David always repeats Family?... yes David we are now a family.

this is the way we go to court, go to court, go to court

Well we finally had our day in court! After much waiting and worrying and yelling at Jeff for not finding out what all the hold up was about.. we finally met before the judge. Funny how anticlimactic things can be.... Just as we got to the courtroom... after waiting a long time to get thru security check points, Emma announces she had to go potty. So Jeff took David and went on the courtroom, by the time Emma was done (and had her hair re-brushed, and her barrettes re clipped, her dressed straightened...) we rushed into the courtroom. and the judge had already finished talking to Jeff. so it was a quick swearing in. answering a few questions. okay i started GUSHING when he asked do we swear to love these kids... and voila that was it. huh? where are the balloons? where is the string quartet? where is my big moment of AHHHH it's over? nah, it was two minutes tops! the judge had already approved all our petitions, so this was just a formality for my sake. Hey I'm not complaining.. it could have all gone horribly wrong!!! but it was sweet and we took a few pictures with the judge.

Our first week home

We've mostly stayed home since getting here. there are enough things to occupy the kids with their playground, room, dogs, fish... lots going on. the kids love their playground and will ask to be on the swings for hours... or until our arms get too tired of swinging them. the sand box is a success too. not so much the slide. i think it's too big and scary for them, and it gives a mean drop. so we have to see about putting it at less of a sharp angle so they won't go flying off of it. David discovered the rings yesterday and delighted us with his flips. these kids are such acrobats.

Grandma: your potty seat is a big success with Emma. She loves it!!!! she claps her hand each time she sits on it and hears the music play. she had no problem at all taking to it. David wants to use the big boy potty. these children are real water lovers and will play with whatever water source is nearest them. can't get enough. they say something like Dom which means shower or bath. and a word that sounds strangely like foam for shampoo/soap. so we hear those quite a bit!

we ventured out of the house yesterday for a short walk. when i showed them the stroller, Emma quickly sat down in the front seat. she busily went about strapping herself in.  David quickly ran over and started checking out the bench in the back. i made the first timers mistake of trying to strap him in. no way, that must be baby stuff!!!! so instead he walked while i pushed Emma around in the stroller. it was a short walk but we had fun. later on in the day, i decided to take them out again, this time i was smart enough to coax him over by suggesting he push the stroller. oh yeah, that can be fun. but once he walked over, he saw the step and hopped up.. hmm here's a chair, let me just try it out. and off we went. no straps of course this time. and really not like we're headed out over rough terrain. Jeff and i took them out again and it was no problem. in fact once we got back the kids decided they wanted more and this time David crawled into the "baby" seat in front, and Emma did her best to hold on in the back seat. this stroller only has one canopy so of course they fought over whose head it would cover. they compromised with David winning and Emma squeezing her head as close to his as possible to be under the shade. we'll have to bring a towel or something next time to use as a shade.

Oh and the best part, the very very very best part is suddenly Emma is my girl and only my girl. she wants me to hold her and carry her everywhere. she gives the sweetest kisses too. she used to just press her face briefly to you and that was her kiss. now she actually puckers up. she kisses European style, once on each cheek and then your mouth. she'll run from me to Jeff and just squeeze our legs and hug us and kiss us. i think that's her way of saying how very happy she is. she's certainly all smiles and squeals. i just love having my little girl. i feel bad for Jeff being left out in the cold as it were, but he's enjoying the small break and he gets his love and squeezes too.

we're still taking turns sleeping downstairs close to the kids. the first night was awful as one child would wake up every hour. so just as i would finally fall back asleep, the other child would wake up screaming. so I'd make my way over to their room, pick them up and sit with them on the glider -- thank god for the glider.. and settle them back in bed. this happened all night long. at around 2am they both woke up wide awake and ready to play. i (having a tiny bit of sense about me) carried them into the bed with me and there we managed to doze on and off until the morning. so i was pretty much a sleep deprived wreck. even the next night when it was Jeff's turn, i woke up at the first sound of a tiny voice. i knew Jeff had it covered but the thought of missing one waking moment was too much!! i confided in Jeff later on i hated being away from them and even though i was exhausted i wanted to be around them all the time. he told me he felt the same way.

last night was my turn again to sleep near the kids and they pretty much slept thru the night. David never woke but Emma did once. she came into my room with her arms up and looking for me. ahhhhh. it took a lot of strength to put her back in her bed and not keep her with me. but early this am, around 6am or so they both came in and i brought them into the bed. David was out like a light, but Emma crawled up right next to me and petted and stroked, and kissed me like i was her little kitty. you can not begin to understand how sweet and wonderful those tiny caresses are. i was in heaven. just me and Emma all snuggled up together. David fast asleep only inches away. i did not want to get up this morning at all!

It's great to be home. the kids are doing incredibly well. they are both extremely happy and full of affection. it could not be any more PERFECT!!!!!!!!

exhausted but home

WE'RE HOME. it was an exhausting schedule. rushed to get packed and get all our items from the tailor. then waited for our facilitator to show up with the kid's travel visas, leaving Hanoi at 5pm rush hour then to the airport. we got off okay, luckily! the descent from Hanoi to Hong Kong was really bad and poor David's ear were really hurting him. i was worried he would not want to go on another plane, but he had no problem at all. in fact the kids discovered the joy of pushing luggage carts around the airport --- even ones that did not belong to them. they were amazing on the long flight home. we kept getting compliments on how well the kids were behaved. they slept on most of the flight or played together. they were really terrific. we got in really late into LA, and i must say immigration was a breeze. we stood in the really long US residents line, until an officer spotted our kids and asked if had adopted them. there's a special line for new immigrants and that's where we were directed. only one person ahead of us on this line!!!! the officer there took our docs and told us to get our luggage.. that was it. the luggage part proved to be a hassle since we were the last ones it seemed to get our bags. by the time we had our luggage and walked back over to the new immigrants line... all our docs were done. that was it.. we got our paperwork and were free to leave. we ended up spending the night at a hotel in LA and catching an 8am flight out the next morning. again the kids were great. Emma slept the whole way home. in fact she was so tired (she did not sleep at the hotel) she slept thru her whole welcome home. David was okay at first, not wanting to say hello to Adam and Alex who picked us up. but that was expected. the car seat was not something he liked at all. Emma, still sound asleep, had no idea that was her mode of transportation home. But once we left the airport and hit the highway, David was fast asleep in his car seat.

yeah

WE'RE COMING HOME. Todd got us tickets out for tonight. so far only to LAX, we may have to overnight it there since the red eyes to Orlando are booked. but we might be able to get tix when we arrive, so we'll see.

will try to post another update when we know more. crazy time to start packing all this stuff we have.

A post from last Sunday

We walked to Al Frescos Saturday night for dinner and the kids had a great time. the waitress, like most of the employees there, are university students studying the hospitality trade. she talked to us for a while and told us how different Americans treat their kids (and in her opinion better) she said they'd never allow their kids to lay on the floor.  she said the Vietnamese would not let their kids color at will. they'd say no the sky can't be green, use the right color, stay within the lines. things like that. she was very sweet and friendly. the kids were great and ate their food and played and had a fine time.

this morning, Jeff was very very nice to me and let me sleep in to a decadent 7am. man who knew sleeping in to 7am could feel so good. we realized we dont' both have to be up this early and that we'll start taking turns at those 5am wake ups. Again this morning, the kids came into our room without crying. they are really comfortable with their surroundings now and know our routine. Jeff and I decided to take the kids out on separate trips, so the boys went to the playground and market while Emma and i went for a walk. There's a tiny market area very close to the hotel. i walked down there and had to keep dodging the fast moving moped traffic down this very narrow path. once i saw it lead to the butcher's market i quickly turnaround. i did not need to know what laid beyond. we then walked to the lake and i remembered the nice mall we had seen. it's a very hi end mall, and i thought it'd be nice to go inside and check it out. the first floor was all jewelers and i really wanted to buy Emma a jade necklace for her (one day) wedding. but not knowing enough about jade, or how much is too much, i just kept walking around.

once we got back outside on the streets, Emma was sound asleep in my arms. I cannot begin to tell you how wonderful that feeling is. she was out like a light and i got to just hold and carry her the few short blocks back. Jeff told me he and David had all kinds of fun in the playground, reinventing the use of the play cars (great devices to shoot down the slide). It was good for the kids to have some private playtime with mommy and daddy. and it was great for mommy and daddy to have some private playtime with the kids.

Sunday night also meant dinner with the other families and our facilitator, Ninh. He took us to dinner.  and once again the kids were just amazing!!!! We dressed them up in cute outfits and they are just so adorable! i wish i had brought a change of top for Emma though since it was so hot and the poor thing was sweltering in the heat, with that high collar and long sleeves.

the Ashton Family

That little girl had some mind of her own!

Emma giving us her Mookie Eyes

They were fine on the car ride there and even with the tons of folks walking around, they seemed to be oblivious. i took David to the buffet line and his eyes lit up at all the goodies. he had to figure out that all this stuff was there for him to eat.  it took him no time to point out all kinds of foods he wanted to eat. none of which I'm sure he's ever had before but if his eyes lit up, and he pointed at it, i scooped up a serving for him. there was one food in particular, Morning Glory, a green spinach like veggie. it was cooked heavily in garlic and the kids gobbled it up. i had to get them 3 servings of it!!!

Hopefully that is one of the foods i can find for them locally. i remember at the orphanage they had some green long, stringy, similar looking veggie simmering in hot water. so i wonder if this is the same thing? after dinner the kids starting playing with the older boy who was also adopted. this was the first time they ever played with him. they avoided him and his sister. but we think that David and Emma now realize we're their parents, that they are with us forever, and it's okay to talk and play with other kids -- even ones from the center. This boy, Rio, was inhaling plate fulls of snails, and David and Emma were fascinated. He was a real pro at it and showed our kids how to scoop out the meat with a toothpick. they just stared at him forever. wow, food and those fun toothpicks all at the same time. Dinner was nice and the kids did so well, but we were ready to head home. it was way past all our bedtimes.

All seven families adopting a total of nine kids! 

shopping the day away

The kids woke up in a good mood this morning and just walked into our bedroom and played for a while. no crying, no confusion as to where they are at. Emma crawled in bed and tried biting our feet in hopes of enticing us to get up already!!!!! David got a toy and just played with his car... happy as a clam.

we thought we'd hit the circus today but it seems it's just an evening performance so we'll see if they have a matinee for tomorrow. a lot of the stuff we want to see is not really kid friendly (like museums) so we're trying to think of things we can do, but that will allow us to be back here for 12noon nap time! we decided to walk over to the quarter. there were some stores we noticed that we wanted to shop at. we got a couple of water puppets similar to the ones in the show. David was thinking these were HIS toys, but I'm hoping to put them on a high shelf in their room. we'll see who wins that battle..

as we headed home we walked along the lake. David and Emma just took off. they were twirling and playing and goofing off. Jeff and i remembered just a few days ago, we attempted a walk by the lake and it was all hysterics then. now they are running and playing all on their own. as we made our way down to the last few blocks before the hotel, i offered to carry Emma as she was now so tired she was nodding off. Instantly David threw himself to the ground and had a fit. Even when we walked together and i took her other hand, David would run around and get between us. While we're out and about he does not like for me to have anything to do with her. but when we're here at the hotel, I'm second class citizen to him. he just wants to play or jump all over daddy. we have to find a balance as it will be impossible getting thru the airports if he does not let daddy take him every now and then, and i can take Emma. so maybe tomorrow we can get Jeff to take David on a walk and I'll hang back with Emma. i miss that little pumpkin pie too. she's such a sweetheart, but boy the will on that girl! they are learning how to push all our buttons and they think it's quite funny.

when we brought them back from walking we put them down for a nap. i heard some noise and peaked in. David was play hitting Emma to keep her awake. they were laughing and doing the mock emmay emmay cry. I'm sure they thought it was a laugh riot how they had us all worked up those first few days. they kept playing and not sleeping, so finally i had to go back inside and lay down with them for a bit. mom, such a spoil sport! it's great though that they are so comfortable with us they can be left in their room alone without screaming. they think it's hysterical to make fun of us (and themselves) that given a nice place to play they'd rather run around then sit in our laps. they have changed and grown so much in so short a time. it's wonderful to see them happy! they are such great kids and being able to walk around and enjoy each other's company and spend the day happily together was really a welcome relief.